Who Wore It Better?
5 filters to make sure the answer is always you
My Edits have felt heavier lately. Honest, but heavy.
This week, I wanted to take a bit of a turn.
And as we move into spring, into April, it feels like the right moment to shift the tone. Toward something lighter. Something lived.
At 52, I know my style. And every March, I have to remind myself of that.
I live in a community where storefront windows are designed to immediately draw you in. Colors. Patterns. Creative and masterful displays intended to entice even the most practical buyer. Hard not to notice. Sometimes hard to resist.
Social media advertising has become so sophisticated that the online version of shopping feels as visceral as Fifth Avenue at Christmas, year-round.
As we slowly come out of winter hibernation, the retail world is on full tilt attempting to draw us in.
I previously wrote an article called The Cost of a Borrowed Identity, and identified what I call The Zara Effect. The slow drift that happens when what you wear starts to look like everyone else, and somewhere along the way, stops feeling like you.
One t-shirt here, a pair of pants later, a set you couldn’t resist that’s almost sold out.
The drift is slow. That’s what makes it dangerous.
I’ve been traveling a lot these past few months. More than usual.
Home has started to feel unfamiliar in that strange way where you wake up and need a second to remember where you are.
And while I’ve loved every trip, I’m equally ready to land.
To come back to routine. To something more grounded.
I wouldn’t have been able to move through that pace and still feel good in my body, or keep my mental health intact, without structure.
Not rigidity.
Structure.And yes, I’m type A. To an extreme. I don’t fight that anymore. I use it.
Especially when it comes to how I live and how I dress.
Because if I’m not paying attention, travel has a way of pulling me into whatever aesthetic I’m surrounded by. A boutique in one city. A perfectly styled window in another. And suddenly I’m holding pieces that made sense there, but don’t belong here.
I’ve done a lot of editing lately.
Closet included.Not to have less.
But to have mine.Because there’s a very specific feeling I’ve learned to pay attention to.
It’s the moment you walk into a room and see someone wearing almost exactly what you’re wearing.
Same designer. Same cut. Same color story.
And instead of feeling connected, you feel… diluted.
Like losing a piece of yourself.
Or disappearing into a pattern that’s only a few shades off from the woman next to you.
That’s The Zara Effect.
And I’m not interested in disappearing. Or sameness.
So lately, here’s what I’ve been leaning on:
1. The “Would I Wear This at Home?” Filter
If it only makes sense in the city I’m standing in, it’s a no. It’s easy to get lost in the boutique window. A straw hat at a beach store in Mexico. A beautiful scarf in a snow village in the Alps. A commemorative t-shirt from the pro shop.
It takes restraint, but in those moments I ask myself how often it will actually be worn after the trip ends. My life isn’t lived in a boutique window.
2. Unknown Over Recognized
If I immediately recognize the item or the brand, I pause.
Recognize usually means everywhere.
3. One Piece, Not the Rainbow
My daughter was guilty of this to the point where I simply couldn’t walk into some stores with her.
Eight of the exact same sweatshirt in every new color drop is not necessary. We all know the stores. They thrive on limited-edition color drops that social media makes viral. One staple color is more than enough.
4. The Airport Test
If I see it three times between security and my gate, I’ve learned what I need to know.
5. Edit in Real Time
I don’t wait for a seasonal purge anymore.
If it doesn’t feel like me now, it doesn’t stay.
None of this is about restraint.
I still love clothing. I still acquire (scroll down to find a few of my latest finds). But the acquisition is different.
It’s aligned. More deliberate.
When I’m window shopping, scrolling, or purging, the question I come back to is simple: who am I wearing this for?
Because the goal was never to have less, well perhaps a little less.
It was to stop borrowing from the look inside the store window and to start owning my own sense of self.
Happy Tuesday. End of March. Beginning of April.
A small return to self.
Always EDITing,
Leslie
Like I said, I still love a good aesthetic. Lately, I’ve been leaning into less-known brands. Ones you can’t find at every mall across the country.
I’ve been a big fan of ME + EM for years for that exact reason. The company began in London, and ordering wasn’t as easy as it is today. Their brick-and-mortar stores were originally just overseas, and I’m a touch-and-feel kind of shopper.
Now there are a handful of stores in the U.S., and when I was in LA last week with Elise, we found our way to their newest location. I tried on the pants, the tops, the sweater. A few pieces made their way home with me.
Not because they were everywhere.
Because they weren’t.
And more importantly, because they felt like me.
The shoes, bag & earrings are also pieces I have and love. Enjoy!
I’d love to know what brands you’re discovering this Spring. Drop a comment below.